Friday, 26 February 2016

Real Talk: The Glorification of Busy


If you follow me on Instagram, you would have seen that I expressed my frustration with this new trend of confusing busy with successful.  Judging by the reaction I received from everyone, it turns out that I'm not the only person who is bothered by this so let's talk about it: the glorification of busy.

I honestly don't know exactly when it happened, when we stopped relying on actual results to show our accomplishments and instead did everything in our power to give the air of a successful person.  A typical conversation now has a intro of "How are you?  I'm so busy." Add a reply of "Oh, I know what you mean.  I'm SO busy" and you've got a figurative pissing match between two people who are using the word interchangeably with successful.  Forget actual results.

Now I'm not completely innocent in the matter.  Faced with a table of people who are complaining/bragging about work commitments, the number of emails they need to respond to, etc. I'm definitely apt to participate.  If I'm not voicing all of the things that I have as commitments, I must not have any commitments at all and therefore am a failure right? Wrong.

We're all busy.  Every single one of us. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed, and I stop to think about my friends who are mothers - now that's busy.  But you know the funny thing is that they don't seem to indulge in the same glorification of busy, perhaps because their successes are much more personal and intimate and mean so much more than a contract landed or a new handbag purchase.  Another round of applause needs to go to those who humbly work smarter, not harder and instead of bragging about their busy schedules they let their results be their noise.  I want to be that person.

As I said in my Instagram, I'm officially retiring from this contest of egos and when someone asks me how I'm doing, how everything is going in my life I'm simply going to respond with "happy."  Does that make me any less successful?  I'll just have to quietly let my results speak for themselves.

Sweater - Joe Fresh, Leggings - Aritzia Daria



A few weekends ago, I stopped to have a coffee and catch-up with Cynthia of Pinch of Chic.  She was the one who took these lovely photos, and it was so nice to chat with like-minded people.  I've always admired her because she truly does have a lot going on, but never indulges in boasting about her schedule.  Instead we were able to grab matcha lattes, chat about handbag wish lists and irritate the patrons of Roosters Coffee House with our photo taking.  Now that's a good time!




What do you guys think?  Are we all too busy for our own goods, or maybe I'm just being sensitive?  Let me know, I would love to hear your thoughts!

xo Joëlle

Photos by Cynthia Nguyen
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20 comments

  1. Great post, Joëlle! And such lovely photos.
    I never really stopped to think about how often the term busy gets thrown around. I totally agree with you in not indulging with ego playing. We all have so much going on, and more than anyone else will know about. Let's get over it and just be positive!

    xx Gabriella
    pastelsandpastries.com

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    1. I totally agree with you Gabriella! Life is so much better when indulging in brunch, flowers and girl talk - basically what happens when the blogger babes get together!

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  2. These are some of my favorite pictures of you to date, I love everything about them!

    I also enjoyed reading your POV here, I'd never really thought about the word busy as an exchange of egos before. When I say I'm busy to someone I honestly just mean I'm busy haha, or too anxious at that moment. I never really thought of it as a glorification of the word.

    I think it's so great to hear about others successes as well as having be genuinely interested in my own. :)

    Love ya girl!

    http://theblondielocks.com/

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    1. It's true, busy can be totally innocent - I mean, we all are right?! I take issue when it's being glorified - which, by the way I have never experienced with you! LOL

      I totally agree with you - let's celebrate the success of others rather than competing and keep the good vibrations flowing! xo

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  3. Preach girl! I'm totally with you on this one. The word busy gets thrown around way too much.
    Love the photos! You love those matcha lattes ;)

    Kris | Love. Loft. Life.

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    1. OMG Kris, I'm addicted - seriously! I need to go to Matcha rehab. So glad that you agree with this. It's one thing to be genuinely busy, but to gloat about it is too much.

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  4. I am sooo busy. lol I don't even use a calendar, which always frustrated me because my friends would always question how I keep on track of things if I don't have a calendar...So I finally got one and I hardly use it.Coming from a Mediterranean background I never understood the concept of busy. I just want to go out and enjoy myself.To me that's busy. Busy enjoying life. But enough with the rant, I love the photos!! Must go to that cafe soon and be busy.lol.

    Eleni xo
    Bijuleni

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    1. I love the way you think Eleni! We need more of the Mediterranean way of thinking!

      Also - no calendar! You're my new hero!

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  5. I have to most definitely agree with you. Funny thing a while back when all this "busy" stuff was getting big on social media one of my friends had her second baby and I then saw BUSY. but never once does she actually say i'm so busy blah blah. She'll just talk about every little thing her babies do that make her happy. So yes I'm definitely with you on this and how every time I hear that word I just get really bad anxiety and I'll join you on elimination of this pretend busy :)
    xo
    The Fashionista Bubble

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    1. So well said, Naghmeh! Being busy and venting about it with friends is one thing, but boasting about it on social media is not cool. Let's all just be happy!

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  6. You're so right! I sometimes feel like people say they're so busy to make it seem like they're really important. I like your approach of saying happy better :)

    Tina
    www.justatinabit.com

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    1. Thanks Tina! I'll let you know about how my approach to saying I'm happy goes!

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  7. I so agree!! I know people that do this and it always seems that it is an ego thing.

    mylifebeingrenewed.blogspot.com

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    1. So true, Melinda. Being busy is totally not the problem, but boasting about it to boost one's ego is. I'm so glad that you agree!

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  8. This is such a great post Joelle. Honestly, I'm totally guilty of complaining about being busy - something I definitely need to work on! I definitely need to take a cue from you and start working on trying to be happy, and let my work do the talking!
    xo
    Siffat
    http://icingandglitter.com

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    1. I'm totally guilty of complaining about being busy too - I just noticed an abundance of gloating about being busy, especially on social media, and it's made me want to just take a step back. And girl, you are busy - you're doing it all! The great thing is, I have never heard you gloat - not even once! Your results totally speak for themselves. xo

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  9. I completely understand what you mean. I say I'm busy from time to time, but I try not to, just because I know, if I tried a teensy bit more to prioritize, I'd be much more successful. "Busy" is all relative anyway. My version of busy could be way different from someone else's version of busy because people handle things at different levels. I like the idea of answering with "happy" instead of "busy"! "Happy" is so much more positive than "busy."

    Lauren Lalipop

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    1. I totally agree with you Lauren, and very well said - busy is relative so why not focus on happy? xo

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  10. I absolutely love this post Joelle. I feel like I've been so guilty of this lately, I use "busy" as an excuse when I forget to reply to a text or abandon plans - when in reality, it's mostly me being lazy or absentminded. I love the idea of replacing happy for busy, it's so much more genuine.

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    1. I'm so glad that you liked the post Melissa, I honestly didn't know how people would take it. Let me know how replacing 'busy' with 'happy' goes, so far I've been loving the change of energy!

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